Pakistani groups demand sending spaceship to moon

Lahore, Pakistan. Extremist and religious groups in Pakistan have asked the government to send a counter spaceship to moon to defeat India’s sinister purposes that have come to the fore with launching of Chandrayaan-1. They have threatened to launch terror and suicide attacks all over the country if their demand is not met. The demand has put the Pakistani government in a tight spot as the country is already battling bankruptcy threats and a heavy spending on a moon-mission will negatively impact its financial health.

The extremist groups are being led by Jamaat-e-Islami leader Mufti Mahtaab Ashufti. Mufti claims that India has launched Chandrayaan-1 in order to demoralize Pakistani people in particular and Muslims all over the world in general. He demanded that Pakistan must launch its own spaceship to moon so that Islamic world doesn’t lag behind in the lunar race. He further claimed that India had evil intentions.

“Our enemies want to keep an eye over our activities round the clock, so that they can defeat us. Jews and Christians have been keeping an eye over us during the day through American and Musharraf trained armies, and now Hindus want to keep an eye over us in the night through their moon-car by putting a spy camera on the moon.” Mufti explained.

Mufti also suspected that all these missions to moon by Kaafirs are aimed at changing the character and nature of moon, so that Muslims have tough time celebrating Eid and other festivals which are announced after moon is sighted. He exhorted Muslims from around the world to defeat enemies of Islam. Mufti also warned Pakistani government and gave them an ultimatum of one week to act.

Government officials were taken aback by this development. Sources say that Pakistan was already planning to demand grants and aid from USA for research and development in the field of space science after India has declared its mission to moon. But now that demand might be seen as a fundamentalist one after extremists have voiced their opinion.

“After such silly statements, nobody is going to believe us. They will all think we are bowing under pressure from religious fundamentalists. Had we got that research grant, our balance of payments crisis would have been taken care of. Now we need to put forth new reasons to demand international grants.” an official in foreign department told Faking News on conditions of anonymity.

Meanwhile in an unrelated development that might further sully the image of Pakistan in international circles, Google headquarters has received a threat mail from an IP address tracked to Rawalpindi. The mail asks Google to close down the orkut group “Eu amo meus amigos” and transfer the ownership to a Muslim, otherwise their headquarters will be blown up. Initially Google officials were confused as the concerned community was in Portuguese language and it meant “I love my friends” and there didn’t seem to be anything un-Islamic about it.

On further analysis it was found out that the orkut community number of “Eu amo meus amigos” was 786, which is regarded as a pious number by Muslims. The sender of the mail apparently wanted that community number to be assigned to some overtly Islamic community. Google has officially launched a complaint with government of Pakistan has asked them to control such fanatic behavior by its citizens. Pakistani officials refused to comment on this development.